The Catch That Mattered — Tara’s Story
At 38, Tara (TJ) Manson joined a competitive women's rugby team in Abu Dhabi having never played the game before. What she found wasn't just a sport, but a group of women willing to make room for her.
For ten years, Tara's body belonged to her children.
Through pregnancy and breastfeeding, it grew them, fed them and carried them. She loves being their mum, and she loves the chaos of life with five boys.
But somewhere in those years, she lost sight of herself.
Outside of being their mum, who was she?
With five South African, rugby-crazy boys, TJ had spent plenty of time on the sidelines. Rugby was already part of family life. But at 38, looking for friendship, connection and something of her own, she finally worked up the courage to join the Abu Dhabi Harlequins Women's Team..
She had never played rugby.
She didn't know the rules.
And this wasn't a beginner's team.
It was a competitive women's club team, where she would be training alongside members of the UAE national team.
There was every reason to wonder whether she belonged.
TJ doubted herself constantly. Getting herself to training each week was hard. She wanted to be there, but worried about being out of her depth, getting everything wrong and letting people down.
But this story isn't really about TJ.
It's about the women who helped her keep showing up.
They sent messages encouraging her to come back and telling her not to give up. When she completely messed up a drill, they gave her pointers and the courage to try again.
“It’s about the women who helped her keep showing up.”
Their encouragement made it easier to return each week, even when she still doubted herself.
And then came the catch.
When TJ caught a high ball in a game, her teammates cheered like she'd just won the World Cup.
It was only one catch.
But they knew what it meant to her.
“It was only one catch.”
And they celebrated it with her.
What amazed TJ was that a team could have that calibre of players and still make room for a 38-year-old mum with absolutely no experience.
These women were training and competing at a serious level. They still took the time to help her learn and feel part of their team.
They didn't see her lack of experience as a reason to keep her out.
They helped her learn.
They encouraged her.
They made room.
After ten years of her body doing so much for her children, TJ began discovering what it could do for her.
With every training session, she found a little more confidence — and a little more of herself.
Rugby brought them together. Those women made her feel she belonged.
That is the story TJ wants to share: women supporting women through rugby.
Through encouraging messages. Patient pointers. And celebrating a beginner's catch as if it mattered to the whole team.
Because to them, it did.
There are plenty of ways to measure what women's rugby is becoming.
More teams. More players. More competitions. More people watching.
But sometimes the important changes are much smaller.
A message telling someone to come back next week.
A teammate taking the time to explain a drill.
A group of women celebrating a catch that, to anyone else, might have looked ordinary.
For TJ, it wasn't ordinary.
And perhaps that's one of the things rugby can do at its best: make room for someone who isn't sure she belongs, and then give her reasons to come back.
TJ hopes her story inspires more women to continue promoting the game — and more women who might be standing on the sidelines, wondering whether they belong, to find the courage to take that first step onto the pitch.
Sometimes, that first step is all it takes to discover a part of yourself you thought you'd lost.
“Make room for someone who isn’t sure she belongs, and then give her reasons to come back.”
WITH THANKS TO
Tara (TJ) Manson
Abu Dhabi Harlequins Women's Team
Thank you for sharing your story with XV Style.
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